{"id":1128,"date":"2017-06-06T05:16:31","date_gmt":"2017-06-06T05:16:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thetravellerslastjourney.com\/shai\/pratchett-esque"},"modified":"2019-08-15T05:24:43","modified_gmt":"2019-08-15T05:24:43","slug":"pratchett-esque","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thetravellerslastjourney.com\/shai\/2017\/06\/06\/pratchett-esque\/","title":{"rendered":"Pratchett-esque"},"content":{"rendered":"

Henry Rockovich; or, Do Magic Mirrors Cause Evil Proclivities (Wicked Witches vs Nokia)?<\/h3>\n

\u201cThe ghosts and their assorted undead et al<\/em> were the first to adopt the new mobile technology. For those who had kept their thumbs when transitioning into the bright light, the keypad was an obvious winner in an industry previously dominated by Ouija boards and foggy mirrors. There were the usual grumble and chain shaking, but this was to be expected from a market segment recognized for its traditionalism and intransigent grudge-keeping.\u201d<\/p>\n

Henry sweated underneath the layers of rugs and mammoth fur as he wrapped up his presentation. The room was too warm, but Henry wanted to show that barbarians could fit into the modern workplace and still look good. Which was not to say that Henry was a conservative. It was a question of survival: if the megafauna won\u2019t have the decency and grace to match improvements in flint technology (not to mention wobbling magnetic poles and whatnot) then it was the duty of the new generation to prove that posture and cerebral volume was good for more than Eye Spy and internecine violence.<\/p>\n

\u201cIn conclusion, it can be seen that the left bar graph is much taller than the one on the right\u2026 and we all know what they say about size!\u201d<\/p>\n

It was a tough crowd. Too many dwarves, and not enough sense of humour. A Banshee in the back was laughing, but he couldn\u2019t be sure whether she\u2019d started before or after the punchline.<\/p>\n

—<\/p>\n

As he packed his caravan, Henry wondered how many more hands he would have to not-rip-off before he was hired away from Sales and into something more prestigious. He hoped for a job in Accounting, Management, or maybe even Perfidy. He wasn\u2019t sure what the third entailed but had seen the label when delivering documents for Mr Blood and thought it would look good engraved onto a personalized sepia business card.<\/p>\n

Mr Blood was not a vampire, although he would end every conversation with the words, \u201cYou can trust me or I don\u2019t want to drink your blood.\u201d The man (98% genetically) inherited his name from his father\u2019s, father\u2019s, father\u2019s, father\u2019s, master \u2013 his great, great grandfather having been head butler to the local count and thus per propriety, inherited the name (like a dog given a family name by a veterinarian’s billing).<\/p>\n

—<\/p>\n

B\/s:<\/p>\n